Belize Day 3, T -5

I am getting settled in well here. It always takes a little time to really feel at home. Get used to the sights and sounds, remind yourself where you are going and how to get there. Something my sister never figures out. She’s an idiot.

The shower was again not hot enough. I do love staying here but that shower sucks, once a day. But I can soldier through it.

I went down to the outdoor bar for breakfast and was greeted by some very good news- Steve went to town early to the bakery and got fresh made cinnamon rolls. A little taste of heaven with cream cheese frosting. Nice. Makes the day start oh so well. I have been to that bakery but not since 2013. Run by an Irish guy or so I hear. I may have to go back for something else though I don’t get up as early as Steve does. I remember they run out of everything later in the day. Like most bakerys I guess.

I am not sitting around today. There is a plan to go to Secret Beach. Or as we call it, Not so Secret Beach. Can’t wait. We have to cross the bridge and drive 45 mins into the north side of the island. This qualifies as an adventure.

Hey Marika, I was looking at a map of Belize and there is a Punta Gorda to the south! I can be sure it is not as good as the Lost Coast. And no sea elephants.

Anyhow, I think we are getting ready, it’s 910 and I think time to go. Just a little sunscreen and we could be off. I have not gone farther north than the prior site of the palapa bar. Which seems to have lost its mojo when it was moved. Too bad.

Secret Beach is supposed to be the nicest beach on the caye. Turquoise water, waist deep to the reef, blah blah. Another Caribbean paradise. Couple of bars, cuz no alcohol is no fun. A restaurant too. In a few years it will probably all be shit. So it goes with all nice spots in the world. They are eventually over run by tourists. Like me. Eventually all places will be accessible for us to destroy. I can hardly wait.

The trip to Secret Beach was adventurous, though nothing really happened. The adventure part is the road surface. It’s crap. But, there has been drastic improvement in the roads north of the toll bridge. Which is how you get to secret beach. The road past the bridge has been paved for about two miles. What a treat. The rest of the 7 mile trip is unpaved, holey, dirt roads and they are crap. Slow driving, weaving around obstacles, loving it.

Secret Beach is quite stunning. Turquoise waters to the horizon, 3 bars, food, lots of activity, shallow warm water. It’s a Caribbean thing, you wouldn’t understand.

First thing, I went swimming, with my phone in my pocket. So that means no pictures. And no phone. Fuck. Never done it before, and I do hope never again.

Those photos above are courtesy of my sister since all photos in my phone were washed away by the Caribbean.

We spent several hours hanging at Secret Beach. The girls kept drinking whereas Steve and I did not. So they got drunk. I did not. We went swimming as well, what else do you do at a beach? Strange thing happened there, we met a young couple from southern Maine. By young I mean 25 and 21. And you won’t forget how old he was because he said he was 25 about 15 or 20 times. Stephen and Britany. They were from a town just north of the New Hampshire border. On their honeymoon. They hung out with us for a while drinking and swimming. Steve seemed to enjoy making fun of Stephen and commenting on Brittanys hotness. Way to go Steve! Really, the guy was really slow mentally and had obviously married up. No worry. Vacation is for meeting new people. And messing with them to entertain yourself. Anyhow, we decided to hear back and hit a couple bars in the way.

So the way back. Five miles of crap roads with my drunk sister in the back facing seat and my increasingly drunk passenger next to me. We decided we were going to stop at some bar or other on the way. Their are bars everywhere. Everywhere. On the way out, it’s a five mile drive on those crappy roads and the cart does not go faster than a bicycle. So a mile down the road I hear my drunk sister yelling ” I lost my shoe I lost my shoe!” I come to a stop and she is hobbling back down the road the way we came to get her shoe, about 50 yards. And the road is a lot of coral and quite sharp and she is drunk and falling down and laughing. And the other two carts are disappearing into the distance. I got out and had to help her get up and walk back to the cart while she complained that her foot hurt. Whiner. Got her in and we got going. Half mile later we actually were able to pass three bicycles. And 100 yards later, sister again “I lost my shoe!!” Did I mention she was drinking? Stop again and she’s off after her shoe and one of the bike riders comes riding up to her with her shoe. And she tries to get a ride from him. Did I mention she is drunk? I had to get out and go get her and her sandal was broken which she told me three times. I had to pull her to the cart and load her up. Yes, drunk sister is fun. So, we go another half mile or so and “I lost my hat, I lost my hat!!” Jesus Christ. She must have jumped off the cart because when I stopped and got out she had her hat and was lying on her back in the road laughing. And me with no fucking camera cause I took it in the ocean. Boy did I want a camera. She also has cut up her arm. I seriously had to assist her up and into the cart. I thought about tying her into the cart. She is drunk. Ok off again. Half mile, no shit, “I lost my hat!!” Good news, it had fallen off her head and was sitting on the back of the seat. We pointed this out and took the hat away from her. Can’t lose it now. Half mile later “I lost my hat!!” We told her we have your hat and she calmed down. Now I gotta ask, did I say she was drunk? So we managed to get to the main road without further issues. Sister laid down in the back. I held her phone and shoes. We got to the next bar where she was revived by a cool drink. Pour alcohol on a fire. We had some food too which is probably a help for the drinkers. Brittany and Stephen had come along as well. People do love alcohol. All the girls had drinks, even my sister. Hey, she’s an adult. We were there an hour and headed out, saying bye bye to the two Mainers.

When we got back Jodie and I went straight to the phone store. She’s an IT professional and quite handy. THe phone store is right across the street from the hotel. The gal in the store swapped my SIM card into someone’s spare phone. So now I have a phone and can take pictures. And stuff. Important stuff. Our fishing trip is tomorrow. That needs to be recorded and pictured. I am going back to the phone hospital tomorrow at 8 to check on my wet phone. Please think good thoughts for my phone.

Came back from the store and went to the usual gathering spot out by the pool. Two of Vince’s dive clients had just flown in. I don’t think they are going fishing with us. Anyway, they are here to dive with Vince. He is a diving instructor.

In the time I was at the phone store my sister managed to sober up some. She and Julie made pico de Gallo and nachos. Both were delicious. What surprises me is my sisters ability to go from falling down (in the road) drunk to able to function so damn fast.

Once we had finished eating, my sister and Julie decided to head next door for martini Monday and maybe more food. She is an adult so it’s ok. I decided to go to bed. I had enough to eat and I am tired. It’s especially tiring to take care of my sister and wash my phone in the ocean all in one day.